Challenge Tips

Learning to say no is very healthy.  I used to say yes, when called to do an extra shift.  I wanted to help the group.  Now, I will help out by doing the shift but get another shift off.  This way, I keep my days off for family, friends or projects.    Now I have enough energy for work and other activities. Because I have enough time off to rest and recover. I am glad I made that switch.

Mrs Sheena D Pracyk, RN‍ Again, very well said! I too reflect back sometimes on when I said yes and probably shouldn't have. I have definitely been able to recognize that I am not always able to give and achieve what I need to in those scenerios.

Thinking back all those years to the beginning of my nursing career, their is an underlying willingness and desire to help and support others. Whether that applies to patients, family members or colleagues - there was a willingness to try to be available, pitch in not to leave anything undone or uncovered. The consequences of not having that mentality was potentially harmful.  I look back on the times I worked 18 hour shifts to cover a call in, multiple 12-hour shift stretches of days picking up extra shifts to cover vacation. The energy and infallibility of youth and optimism! With experience (and maturity) I wonder if I was really giving my best to myself or others during those times.  As I have learnt more about the importance of self-care and managing both time & energy for better health, wellbeing and performance my view has definitely changed... as had my body which would no longer keep up that pace!
I definitely still have to watch my "people-pleasing" urge to take on projects and say Yes to everything.  I think the underlying automatic negative thought that I have, is that people may think I am being selfish or may feel disappointed or let down but that's probably not the reality. Even if it is, those are their responses and I have to focus on mine. That may mean having to shift away any guilt, reflect on the reasons why I'm saying No and redirecting that self focus (not selfishness) into the areas that serve me best. Like all habits - it takes practice and constant reinforcement and commitment to make progress. 

You never want to leave peers in lurch, but sometimes you have to prioritize and take care of your patient's needs and nicely say you are not available right now.

no I can say no if I need too